Eeek! A Rogue Mouse In The Office

Sydney Morning Herald

Monday June 5, 2006

David Higgins

THE office prank used to be as simple as stuffing a workmate's umbrella with confetti or leaving phone messages from Sue Ridge at Sydney Water.

But when we asked readers to send in their favourite workplace practical jokes, it became obvious that 21st-century technology has raised the bar. Did you realise that a computer can be operated by two mouses at the same time? John plugged a second cordless mouse into the computer of a workmate, Harry. "Every few hours when Harry was typing an email, John would use the cordless mouse to open and close programs, hit 'send' on unfinished emails or turn up the volume while Harry looked on in bewilderment," said our correspondent. After a couple of weeks, an accomplice, Charlie, asked Harry about the PC problem. "Charlie said he had read an article about this and it was definitely a case of 'Rogue Mouse Syndrome'. I can only imagine the reaction of the IT help desk."

If you arrive at work to find your PC not working at all, it may be because the monitor contrast button has been turned to zero. If clients leave angry messages it's probably because the words "and" and "but" have been automatically replaced with swear words in your word processor. Or perhaps the office nerd has replaced your PC wallpaper with a "screenshot" of your computer desktop. No matter how many times you click on that important document, it's not going to open.

Some classics are still popular. Karen remembers sending office assistants to another floor for a "verbal agreement form". Juniors in workshops are still sent to the hardware store for a left-handed screwdriver or a long weight.

"With the help of a colleague, I once put my boss's desk in the lift at work," recalls Jake. "It went from floor to floor for a few hours."

Every day before work, Bella arrived early to move a colleague's desk one centimetre closer to the wall: "After three months and nearly a metre she was squirming to fit into her workstation."

Flynn enjoys rushing up to workmates, handing them an unconnected telephone receiver and saying, "It's an important call."

Some tricks were a little more elaborate. "I once swapped two people's cubicles while they were at lunch," boasts Scott. "The pens, the mouse-pads, the pads of paper, the drawers, the chairs, the computers - it was all exactly the same, just in the wrong cubicle."

The office toilet was a popular place for pranks. "Some years ago I brought to work three pairs of pants and three pairs of shoes, arranged them on the floor of the men's cubicles and locked the doors," says Tony. Lindy simply placed a sign next to the hot-air hand dryer: "Press here for important announcement from management."

David Higgins

THIS WEEK: If you could uninvent a technology or undiscover a scientific breakthrough, what would it be? Post your contenders at smh.com.au or email dhiggins@smh.com.au.

© 2006 Sydney Morning Herald

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